Free to Live

I CORINTHIANS

Here is a question: If you could live in any way that you wanted, how would you chose to live?

My first thought is that I would live a relaxing life. I would wake up when my body woke me up every morning. I would make a delicious breakfast, drink coffee and read -- all while sitting in a cozy armchair. I would work during the day -- enough to be kept busy but not enough to be stressed. I would go home, watch Gilmore Girls, spend time with friends and family, make dinner. I would use my free time to knit, listen to music, go for walks, flip through decorating magazines, or make collages. I think.

Actually, in a strange way, if I give myself the freedom to chose the ideal life I become confused - I am not sure why, but the above scene, which I wrote and created in complete freedom, does not seem like it would satisfy me. This is experiential -- have you ever had a Saturday that you used to "do what you wanted", and by the end you still didn't know what you wanted to do? There is a sense in which complete freedom is not beneficial; when left completely to our own discernment we make choices that hurt us instead of making us happy.

In my last entry I spoke of a freedom that Christianity offers -- the freedom to fail. We do not have to strive to become good people, restricted and condemned by the commands in the bible. We have already failed to meet them, we can freely admit our weakness. Another freedom Christianity offers is the freedom to live, and by this I mean Christianity enables us to live the best, most fulfilling life possible.

Allow me to explain: We think the commands in the Bible are bad, that they keep us from having a full and happy life. We think them bad because they're difficult, bad because we are bad at keeping them. But they aren't.
We think that we will be happy if we had more time to relax, if we had people who loved us more intimately, if we had more money -- but by experience we can verify that this isn't true.
So if what I think is good for me isn't good for me, then maybe what I think is bad for me isn't bad for me -- and maybe when humans try to redefine good and bad we are taking freedom a step too far.

The problem with my initial ideal is that it was characterized by selfishness -- a desire to meet my own wants and needs. Other people either serve to this end, or I ignore them. Though deceitfully masked to be satisfying, selfishness sucks the life out of life.

Though Christianity frees us to fail, it does not free us to live however we want. There is still a law governing the universe -- the law of love. If one "virtue" would characterize our actions, thoughts, plans, it ought and needs to be love. This is not meant to burden us, rather, love is the fullness of life. Without it, relationships would become tasks, learning would be a chore -- we would drag our feet to and from work, burdened. But with love, every aspect of life, no matter how menial, becomes vibrant.

Christianity has conquered selfishness and commands love, freeing us to live.